Tuesday, January 8, 2013

UNBEARABLE...YET....ENDURING

This year has come and gone really fast...things were somewhat different this year, my mom and daddy were not able to make the trip out here for Christmas, due to health issues, and along with a little bit of this and a little bit of that, Christmas just was i'll say different.
 
As I was taking the decorations down after I had unplugged the Christmas tree lights for the last time this year, I was thinking to myself, should I or should I not go to a few stores for after Christmas sales. Being so not a shopper or crowd person, I chose to just sit back for a few more minutes and enjoy and cherish some of the reminants of Christmas that were over-looked here and there. A nativity scene still stands covered with hay with Baby Jesus in the manger, this is a hard one to part with. There is even a tiny Reese's cup wrapper, that i forgot to throw it away (actually its, Viana's favorite candy, so by leaving the wrapper, its not laziness on my part, but to remind me of viana's favorite candy!)
 
Another Day after Christmas Holiday...It has been 3 weeks or so since I heard the news of Newtown, Connecticut.  It has never left my mind, I had sat down several times to write about these 26 innocent lifes that were so tragically taken.  I kept wanting to say something, to write something, or do something.  I kept thinking of the mothers who were planning funerals, while i was buying Christmas gifts.  There is something about such evil at Christmas that has made this year, this Christmas somewhat troubling.  Time after time, I kept staring at the laptop, trying to write, but the words just wouldnt come.
 
I did read these lyrics to a song called "Welcome to our world".  it says " Tears are falling, hearts are breaking, How we need to hear from God. You've been promised, we've been waiting..Welcome child"  It is at Christmas that we truly talk about peace.  We say it on Christmas cards, sing about it in church.  The tragedy in Newtown was a reminder that we still long for peace.  It is when the routine of our lifes are interupted with evil that we realize how much we need to hear from God.
 
According to the calender, (which reminds me, I need a new calender, my 2012 one is still on the month of December), Christmas is over.  Now is the time people begin to take down their decorations.  Some will leave them up until New Years day or even later.  We pack up our decorations, take the tree down, outside lights come down and boxes go back to storage.  Soon the stores will begin new displays for Valentines day, Santa will be replaced with pink hearts and red candy boxes.  Within days, you will barely see any sign of Christmas in our homes or in the stores.
 
Being a mother, my heart hurts for the mother in Newtown who didn't get to watch her child open Christmas gifts.  For that mother it isn't just the day after Christmas, it is the week after a funeral.  Today is another day she has to find the strength to put one foot in front of the other.  Tonight is another night she can't read Green Eggs and Ham one more time.  So, as I ask God to heal her heart, to wrap His arms around her and help her to get out of bed every morning.  Help her when the birthdays come and go, or when she smells playdough or sees barbies and Tonka Trucks and hot wheels.  Help her when she sees a child in  a store that is the age her child would have been.
 
I ask God to teach me something, teach me to slow down, to hug my kids and grandkids more. I pray for the town of Newtown, as they heal.  I pray that God will give them peace.  Even though the calender says Christmas has come and gone, I pray that all of us will keep the message of Christmas in our hearts long after the last string of light is packed away.  I have come across and read 2 very emotional poems that i want to share with you.
 
I didn't know your name, I never saw your face.  I never got to see you smile or get to watch you play.  I never got to walk with you or watch you board the bus.  I never got to know you, we were worlds apart, but on this tragic day, you've a place in my heart.  Your smile was robbed, your laughter stole away, but it is upon angels wings, you rest your head today.  We may never understand the evil, which struck your life today.... it goes on, yet, i can't see the words through the tears... give me a few minutes to gather my thoughts and words...
 
The Field Trip....
 
Please don't cry, we're ok, we went on a field trip today. A secret place where there's fun to be had. and the principle's with us, so we won't be bad.  It's full of toys and rainbows slides.  Cotton candy and high cloud rides. A funny zoo full of different things.  I even saw a man with wings.  We're not alone so don't you fear, we're chaperoned by Jesus here.It's really nice, so I think I'll stay. And hold your spot till your field trip day. I know Christmas is here and there's toys to be given, so please tell Santa that I'm in Heaven.
 
Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newton, Connecticut... a Nation mourns your loss, our thoughts and prayers to your families and your community ... may you rest in peace...Chase, josephine, Ana, Dawn, Mary, Benjamin, Catherine, Caroline, Noah, Charlotte, James, Grace, Victoria, Dylan, Emilie, Jessica, olivia, allison, lauren, Anne, Avielle, Jack, Daniel, Rachel, Madeline and nancy.
 
This has taken me almost a month to actually open my laptop and just start saying what i needed to say about this tradgic event, where innocent lifes were taken so suddenly and without reason or warning.  I have had many emotional conversations with others, sometimes we ask why, sometimes we just pray for some comfort, and at times we cry.  It does give me some peace knowing heaven is full of toys, rainbow slides.  It helps to know that Jack the spunky sports fanatic who loved the New York Giants, Daniel who all he wanted for Christmas was his 2 front teeth, Madeleine, so shy, yet sweet, unique, bright, sparkling , determined and a born leader, and Olivia, the Daisy Scout who would lead grace every evening at the dinner table, Emilie the oassionate artist, Noah loved to build things, Benjamin, the life of the party! Catherine loved all animals, Charlotte was sweet and spunky....
 
No matter how many times the raw sickning facts are repeated, they continue to give us chills, and cause  tears to flow. 
 
Last week, I worked for another doctor, and I overheard a young lady's conversation with her dad and I was moved and decided to do this also.  In memory of the 26 lifes taken, to do 26 acts of kindness to others, people you know, or even strangers.  Just imagine if each of us did this, the world would be a nicer, sweeter place to live and full of kindness.
 
Because of His AMAZING GRACE


No comments:

Post a Comment