It's been along haul.... since July 9th....my Monday thru Thursday nights taken up by the Substance Abuse Counsoling Program at UOP. I have no clue how I am doing this, well actually I do: Phillipians 4:13 " I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"
I have learned more than i ever imagined! I have been able to take a look at myself... my weakness's, my strength's, empthany, sympathy, boundaries, the laws, communicable diseases, co-occuring disorders, treatment planning, did i mention English?.. fragments, run-ons, verbs verbs and verbs! How to facilitate groups, that's where we are now.... i know its a matter of time and Dr. Kirkwood is gonna put me on the spot, i better get prepared!( and that reminds me... a 4 page term paper due in a week, maybe i should get started!) Oh and i feel like i have, well i know i have made some new friends...Damian, Eddie, Ronnie, Cynthia, Joe, angelina,Celeste, Nancy, Steve (who knows, maybe our professional paths will cross). I have also learned that we are all human and most of us are too hard our ourselves....we are our own worst critic, so we need to be kind and give ourselves a break. So that brings me to "EVER MAKE A MISTAKE?"
Why do we heap blame upon ourselves whenever we make a mistake? Is it human nature or is there something else going on here? Maybe it's a residual effect of our chronic addiction, of years of self-neglect and self-destruction that's resulted in our total lack of belief in ourselves. Sure, we've made some mistakes. Who hasn't? Does that mean that we should drag out the list of all our failures and constantly go over them, making ourselves even more miserable in the process? What good does that do?
The fact is that mistakes happen. Some occur because we've taken shortcuts, eager to get to the desired outcome that much quicker. Some happen because we lack a vital piece of information needed to complete the job. Other mistakes take place because we haven't attained a certain skill the task requires. Why beat ourselves up over these things? Instead look at what didn't go the way we planned or anticipated or even the way we believe something was supposed to happen and make the necessary revisions?
One reason so many people give up is they harbor the mistaken belief that they'll never get it right., that they've always been failures and they're destined to continue to fail. With that kind of a mindset, is it any wonder that so many people stop short of achieving their full potential? Still, it doesn't have to be this way. There are things we can do, very practical things, to help us gain more self-confidence, and not be so hard on ourselves. It simply doesn't do us any good. And we all know that we can use all the help we can get, so really it is counter-productive to focus on what we've failed at rather than what we can do.
A piece of advise that was given to me once was to seek the support of others who may be able to offer suggestions that may help us as we tackle certain tasks or projects. I have found this is especially true if what we're trying to accomplish or deal with is overcoming a problem or issue that's common in early recovery, such as dealing with persistent cravings and urges, finding a job, mending relationships, or even how to communicate more effectively. i can say I have been so blessed with all the people in my life.... and yes my first sponsor Lou, and current sponsor Tina (love you both)
It is important that we don't let pride stand in the way of us trying our best to learn what we can from others who freely offer suggestions. We don't have to do exactly what others have done, but we can certainly see what we can learn from their experience. Is this some common threads between what they went through and what we've experienced that we can draw a parallel to.
Making mistakes, if we allow them to derail our progress, will result in us being stagnate. We will be giving the mistakes a power that they don't deserve. Everyone makes mistakes. Some of us build them into a mountain that we're afraid to climb, let alone have the courage to find alternate routes around. This also means that, far from trying anything new, we'll tell ourselves that we've gone as far as we can possibly go. We rationalize that we're just meant to be where we are and that we can't go beyond this point.
But, i believe that's alot of nonsense! Trying new things, even after making a mistake and experiencing a disappointment, can help us broaden our world view and has the added benefit of giving our self-confidense a much needed boost. Just think Thomas Edison tried over 700 times before he knew how not a light bulb worked. He never failed. And can't we all use a little more encouragement in our lives? So, I challenge you to make it a point to look at what is possible, rather than looking backward and regretting your mistakes. Life is after all, an unending learning experience. There is so much that life has to offer, but we just need to give ourselves permission to learn and grow and evolve. One of my instructors told us if we don't learn something new each day, we might as well die. Believe me, it won;t come without sacrifices of time, energy and yes making some sense of our mistakes so that we have a better more workable plan to go forward. but this is what life is all about...the chance to take what is and transform it into what we want it to be.
So, I challange you to get started today. Instead of looking for why we can't succeed, look at what you can do. Start small with reasonably achievable goals. Make an effort to keep going and not giving up at the first sign of difficulty or whenever we encounter a minor roadblock. Please know we will all have those roadblocks. It jsut means we need to use our creativity to find alternate solutions, to design a different strategy or approach. Good things will happen when we keep going , and when we do the next right thing, even when no one is looking. Let's be determined to find the promise that we know is really there. And never forget... make this your motto, place in on a sticky note where you will see it every day. In fact, place it in more than one place, your mirror in the bathroom, on the frig, on ur dashboard in the car, ur place of employment....Phillipians 4:13.." I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"
because of HIS AMAZING GRACE....
I have learned more than i ever imagined! I have been able to take a look at myself... my weakness's, my strength's, empthany, sympathy, boundaries, the laws, communicable diseases, co-occuring disorders, treatment planning, did i mention English?.. fragments, run-ons, verbs verbs and verbs! How to facilitate groups, that's where we are now.... i know its a matter of time and Dr. Kirkwood is gonna put me on the spot, i better get prepared!( and that reminds me... a 4 page term paper due in a week, maybe i should get started!) Oh and i feel like i have, well i know i have made some new friends...Damian, Eddie, Ronnie, Cynthia, Joe, angelina,Celeste, Nancy, Steve (who knows, maybe our professional paths will cross). I have also learned that we are all human and most of us are too hard our ourselves....we are our own worst critic, so we need to be kind and give ourselves a break. So that brings me to "EVER MAKE A MISTAKE?"
Why do we heap blame upon ourselves whenever we make a mistake? Is it human nature or is there something else going on here? Maybe it's a residual effect of our chronic addiction, of years of self-neglect and self-destruction that's resulted in our total lack of belief in ourselves. Sure, we've made some mistakes. Who hasn't? Does that mean that we should drag out the list of all our failures and constantly go over them, making ourselves even more miserable in the process? What good does that do?
The fact is that mistakes happen. Some occur because we've taken shortcuts, eager to get to the desired outcome that much quicker. Some happen because we lack a vital piece of information needed to complete the job. Other mistakes take place because we haven't attained a certain skill the task requires. Why beat ourselves up over these things? Instead look at what didn't go the way we planned or anticipated or even the way we believe something was supposed to happen and make the necessary revisions?
One reason so many people give up is they harbor the mistaken belief that they'll never get it right., that they've always been failures and they're destined to continue to fail. With that kind of a mindset, is it any wonder that so many people stop short of achieving their full potential? Still, it doesn't have to be this way. There are things we can do, very practical things, to help us gain more self-confidence, and not be so hard on ourselves. It simply doesn't do us any good. And we all know that we can use all the help we can get, so really it is counter-productive to focus on what we've failed at rather than what we can do.
A piece of advise that was given to me once was to seek the support of others who may be able to offer suggestions that may help us as we tackle certain tasks or projects. I have found this is especially true if what we're trying to accomplish or deal with is overcoming a problem or issue that's common in early recovery, such as dealing with persistent cravings and urges, finding a job, mending relationships, or even how to communicate more effectively. i can say I have been so blessed with all the people in my life.... and yes my first sponsor Lou, and current sponsor Tina (love you both)
It is important that we don't let pride stand in the way of us trying our best to learn what we can from others who freely offer suggestions. We don't have to do exactly what others have done, but we can certainly see what we can learn from their experience. Is this some common threads between what they went through and what we've experienced that we can draw a parallel to.
Making mistakes, if we allow them to derail our progress, will result in us being stagnate. We will be giving the mistakes a power that they don't deserve. Everyone makes mistakes. Some of us build them into a mountain that we're afraid to climb, let alone have the courage to find alternate routes around. This also means that, far from trying anything new, we'll tell ourselves that we've gone as far as we can possibly go. We rationalize that we're just meant to be where we are and that we can't go beyond this point.
But, i believe that's alot of nonsense! Trying new things, even after making a mistake and experiencing a disappointment, can help us broaden our world view and has the added benefit of giving our self-confidense a much needed boost. Just think Thomas Edison tried over 700 times before he knew how not a light bulb worked. He never failed. And can't we all use a little more encouragement in our lives? So, I challenge you to make it a point to look at what is possible, rather than looking backward and regretting your mistakes. Life is after all, an unending learning experience. There is so much that life has to offer, but we just need to give ourselves permission to learn and grow and evolve. One of my instructors told us if we don't learn something new each day, we might as well die. Believe me, it won;t come without sacrifices of time, energy and yes making some sense of our mistakes so that we have a better more workable plan to go forward. but this is what life is all about...the chance to take what is and transform it into what we want it to be.
So, I challange you to get started today. Instead of looking for why we can't succeed, look at what you can do. Start small with reasonably achievable goals. Make an effort to keep going and not giving up at the first sign of difficulty or whenever we encounter a minor roadblock. Please know we will all have those roadblocks. It jsut means we need to use our creativity to find alternate solutions, to design a different strategy or approach. Good things will happen when we keep going , and when we do the next right thing, even when no one is looking. Let's be determined to find the promise that we know is really there. And never forget... make this your motto, place in on a sticky note where you will see it every day. In fact, place it in more than one place, your mirror in the bathroom, on the frig, on ur dashboard in the car, ur place of employment....Phillipians 4:13.." I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"
because of HIS AMAZING GRACE....
