ACT NOW TO MAKE A CHANGE.....

Most of us, we count on there being a tomorrow, however, some of us will not see tomorrow.  In either case, there's no time like the present to do the things that we have either been putting off or are to lazy to attempt today.

 

I like the question..."does motivation bring productivity or does productivity bring motivation?"  Either way, it is only by acting that we accomplish our goals, whatever they may be.  It doesn't matter if the goal requires long-term planning and step-by-step achievement of goals or if the desired outcome is one that we want to accomplish today.  If we fail to act, our goals wont be achieved.  Not today, not ever.  Goals are only met when we put in the effort and do the hard work required to achieve them.

 

Who can make the changes but us?  Our loved ones, our family, our friends, a sponsor, a therapist, an employer cant do them for us.  Others can make recommendations, encourage and support us, even inspire us with their actions

 

Why do we put things off anyways?  For some, it's the fear of failure.  For others, it's the fear of rejection, or a combination of the two.  Or, we may just be too lazy, feel we have too much on our plate already and think there is always tomorrow to get busy and care of matters.  I believe we can overcome the tendency to put off what needs to be done by taking small steps towards our goals.  We don't have to bite off more than we feel we can chew, just take small bites.

 

It's important to remember that we grow as we learn.  Little things do add up.  We can make "making changes" a little easier by setting a small but desirable goal for ourselves.  Then we can figure out the best way to go about achieving that goal.  Then we need to get busy and do what needs to be done.  At the end of the day, we'll have made progress and made some small changes in our life.

 

Most of the time, people have a tendency to make New Year's resolutions, yet how many actually stick to them? I know the percentage is pretty small.  I'm not one to talk, because it seems to be the story of my life, not being able to follow through with change.  I'm for sure not saying change is easy, because for me, it's very challenging.  I do believe age henders making changes, makes it more difficult, kind of like the saying "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink."  I will admit, there are times that I will dig my heels into the ground and not budge.  I'd like to be able to say "I welcome change", but that's not true for me.  I am trying to be more open about change!

 

I do know change is inevitiable, some easy, most not so easy.  When it comes to change, I do like:

 

*change of seasons

*change of colors in the fall

*time change twice a year

*change in my purse

*changing of the guard in Washington DC

*change of pace ( I love free-time)

 

some harder changes for me:

 

*changes in technology

*change in routine

*change of careers

* change of diet

 

 

I have learned though that change is easier for me if I turn it over to God and ask for His guidance, His strength, His direction, and stay open minded and open hearted for his plans to prosper me.  And I can do all this because of His AMAZING GRACE....



My Me-Ma's "NEW WORLD"......

"36 hour day" and "Learning to speak Alzheimer's" arrived today....it's hard to put them down.  I have so much to learn and understand, I hope it's formatted simple enough for me.  I don't even know the difference between Alzheimer's, dementia, and just plain memory-loss.  At this point, whatever the name of the disease my Me-Ma has, something, something that has made her lose some of her intellectual ability and the ability to think and remember.  The ability to think before she says something and the ability to say something without thinking.

 

I want to learn to speak Alzheimer's.  I want to learn to live in my Me-Ma's world.  I want to learn that when her words "fail" her (she always says " I don't blame you if you want to leave, I'm not good company, because I don't know what to say or what to tell you) I want to be able to "listen" to her through her eyes when she tells me that.

 

Just recently, I have reached out and talked with several people who have loved ones living in the Alzheimer's world....I don't feel as alone.  I now know there are millions and millions of "us" out there watching and grasping at straws to learn about, understand, be patient and not wear our hearts on our sleeves.  I know we're not alone anymore.  It is just so sad how devastating, irreversible and progressive this disease is.  It breaks my heart to see how it robs millions of people of their language, reasoning, and memory.  It destroys a lifetime of memoires, and it just seems to whittle away at the core of a person's identity.....I don't know, maybe it is just my pure selfishness, I don't know, but I feel robbed, robbed of my vibrant me-Ma, who loved to fish, who taught me how to play yatzee, who loved camping, who loved going to church and worshipping our Lord, singing How Great Thou Art, and Amazing GRace, who made the best ever peach cobbler and beans and cornbread with black-eyes and okra.

 

Even though I know Alzheimer's is the 3rd most costly disease after heart disease and cancer, there just seems like there is a hopelessness..  I don't know much, but I do know when I hear the words "this is not the person I knew", I am greatly saddened.  I have heard these words on tv, read them on the internet, read them in the newspaper and I hear these words in person, in fact, I personally have said these words.  This disease is difficult to understand and hard to accept. 

 

I know some people can be so happy and child-like, not a care in the world, and be so happy-go-lucky, yet there can be such a range of negative emotions also.  It can come on so powerful that it is equilvelent to a human tsumaini.  Anger, sadness, feelings of hopelessness and the inability to cope apparently are so common.  So, not being a part of the Alzheimer's world....it's easy to believe that the person you know, is not the person you knew.  It's an easier approach to something  that is very difficult to understand and accept.

 

I have come to accept that Alzheimer's is an illness.  It is a disease of the brain.  It seems to differ from most other diseases, being it lasts for years, even decades, and there is no cure.  This disease changes the way a person talks, the way a person acts and behaves.  We've personally experienced this and its hard, devastating and so painful.

 

I know my Me-Ma didn't sign up for Alzheimer's.  She didn't ask to go into this new and bizarre world.  She doesn't say the irrational things she has said with intent.  I know her brain is not functioning properly.  I know this is caused by the disease.  This change in our Me-Ma is so dramatic and so enormous that it takes time to digest and understand and accept for that matter.  I just pray that we will all become comfortable with Alzheimer's.  For now, I just want to understand that Me-Ma's brain sometimes sends her the wrong signal quite often. And for now, I want her to use my brain when necessary.  I just pray and hope I can accept and view her words and actions as her "new normal".  After-all, it's a new world.  It's Alzheimer's world, and in Alzheimer's world, you become more and more forgetful, and you move and do things slower and slower.  It's not always easy to adjust to a slower and slower pace, but I know its my time to learn.  It's my time to learn patience.  And of coarse, its one of the fruits of the vine, and there is a definite upside to learning patience.  Once I learn more and more, I can take this new found patience into the "Real World".  So, it's a win-win....patience in the Alzheimer's world and in the Real World!

 

And I know, people with Alzheimer's have gifts to give.  I know my Me-Ma has lots of gifts to give, after-all with all her strengths, all her wisdom, all her faith, all her love, and all her courage, how can I not be blessed?  So, today, as I do in my own recovery, I will take "one day at a time" in her new world.

 

and this is all because of HIS AMAZING GRACE......

MY SUNDAY AT THE FEEDSTORE.....

This may come as a surprize to some....sometimes I even surprize myself,  I try to be a good sport  about it when it comes time to tending to the animals at the feedstore on our Sunday feeding day.  Yes, i am deathly afraid of rats and snakes and cats and rabbits and guinia pigs and roosters and and and! But sometimes you do what you have to do!

Thank God I'm a country girl...well, at one time I was....doesn't mean I am now! So, a day ( ok an hour or so) at the feedstore, on a Sunday when we're closed, after-all they need feed and water too!  On this particular day, I go in my favorite pajama's and slippers (usually I'm in socks or barefooted, but not doing this chore!

We also have Mazy-Grace gracing us with her presence today....so, we know we are in for a treat!  talk about a treat...she thinks she has hit the treat jackpot....she think she is sneaky, but she really isn't!  First it is a pig ear, and wonders as slyly and quickly as possible, then she greets "Wetto" with her shrill bark, and Wetto responds with "Hello' and a rockin wave.  Ok, W

etto, I hear you, I know all your peanuts are gone, I'll get you some more!  Then there is Aruba, a Citron cockatoo...don't trust this little guy, for he is known for biting people, he even has a sign on his cage that states "I bite"  and you want me to get close to you?? no thanks!

Mazy is just running from place to place cage to cage and trading her treats in for new ones!  something is intriquing her in the fish room, until the roosters "cock-a-doodle-do" caught her attention! Birds, birds and more birds....zebra finch, yellow cockateils, mustache parkakeet, button quails, doves, pigeons, baby chicks, hens, roosters and then there is the pure white fluffy rabbit right in the middle of these guys!  Made absolutely no sense to me....but who am I !

Did I say Mazy has now snuck a pig ear, a bone, a plastic shoe and is continuing to see what she can sneek!

so, now that all the little birds are fed and watered, its out back to the roosters, the doves, the pigeons, and the baby chicks.  EEEKKK....their feeders and waters are so gross.....but I wanted to get home, so I rolled up my sleeves and reached in there and got it done!  Not something I want to do on a regular basis though!  Now, its off to the way back where there are even more critters.  This area is alittle more intriguing to me.  There is an elevator type thing that I guess used to bring sacks of feed upstairs.  This particular day made me visualize what 70 some years ago how things used to work....made me wonder if there was a fork lift or if everything done by hand.  There were several areas of the store that I had never even seen before and to be honest there are still a few areas that I really don't want to see.....greg says its called mezzine.  That's one place I wont ever be going....I know for a fact that the rats and mice live up there....One time Alexis and I saw them run up that elevator thing and we both screamed and we were done!

Then there's the egg room or where the egg room used to be.  The turkeys, the baby animals that are too little be put out for sale are back in this area. Then there is the room that collapsed just recently.  and the area where all the building goes on.  Between Mike and Tony looks like a wood shop in this one area...they build dog houses, more and more chicken coops, pens, racks and anything eles they want!

So, I can say that I once was a country girl....still have just a little country in me!